i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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