That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I could make wine with my vomit
you traded sex for a burrito?
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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