why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Randomize
