...so i touched it.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
