had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
