I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Four minutes until I can fart!
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Randomize
