i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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