My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize