Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize