White coat. Heels.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
