i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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