Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
so much tequila, so little girl.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
