Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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