its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
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True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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