the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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