You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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