Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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