Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
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