Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
