I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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