You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
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