Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
