My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Randomize