Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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