I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
