Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
