Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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