this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
