"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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