Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
