Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
