I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize