You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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