I love black thongs
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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