I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
