just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Randomize
