who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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