wat bout pragnant strippers??
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Boobs speak an international language.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Randomize