I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
