Whod you bang
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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