After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I licked your asshole in confidence.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
