And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize