what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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