so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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