I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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