Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
