I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
