You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Dear god my vagina.
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