He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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