Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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