we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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